Photo Credit: Ronke Oyefuga

Dear Betty…..

Dear Betty,

This open letter is definitely long overdue on this page, and sincerely, Birogs won’t be complete without it.

I thought about this very well before deciding to write this, for the main reason I have not all these years – respecting your sense of privacy. However, today, I will go against your wish and do just what I want to do and deal with your mouth later! Yes, funny people see both of us as public people, and I smile! Only if they know what they don’t know that we know! 🙂

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I want to thank God for making our paths cross, and the thanks cannot be complete without blowing kisses to Abeni Salawa! Oh! Sorry, Benita 🙂 Yeah, I am trouble-searching this morning. I still think back to that fateful day almost two decades ago, when as typical of me, I was ready to run back home and just leave Benita with you – at least that was the plan and you all insisted I stayed. I did not like the idea initially, but today, I am thankful to God.

I remember how the three of us sat and jisted all through the night as if we were all from the same womb. Yes, I had and have known Benita almost all my life, so it was not a big deal hanging out with her like that because that was just US.

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Finding myself relaxed in the home of a complete stranger is what beats me! I remember uncle Leye checking up on us a few times during the night to find us still laughing away; and unlike many Nigerian husbands, did not mind. Thank you uncle Leye for being constant since that day.

AbettieBettie, you have been that sister God allowed me to choose. How different we both are, but yet complement each other so well.

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You have been there for me through the toughest times in my life – my days in the wilderness. You have always been ready to throw me a life-line by simply listening and praying for and with me; or simply being there in any capacity needed. Even when you needed to judge me like everyone else did, you did not! You told me where I went wrong and still was there when I turned my neck! When all I saw was darkness and no way out, you lit a match stick and held my hands out of the darkness. I am in tears now. Jeez! Thank you Betty! I pray I can be the kind of friend you have been to me, but in all honesty, I doubt I can match.


I remember my pregnancy days – those days we were unsure if I would make it through the 9 months of pregnancy. Hmmm! I remember your calls just to make sure I was not in the hospital since that was a norm through my Prego days. I remember the beautiful baby shower planned by you, and me looking like Heavy-D 🙂 I remember your first words when our Sunshine came out and turned out to be your OPOM (Yes, I remember that word). I remember all you did during the 9 days after he was born and no one was sure I would make it through! You always told me I would not leave him for you to raise, that we would raise him together, and yes, God answered your prayers. I remember when I was finally medically cleared and your OJUMIRIRE 🙂

I remember your plan with uncle Leye to sneak into our home to install hidden CCTVs because of…… 🙂 OMG! Betty! I remember when we lost Adams! You were the first one that I called. I remember crying together over the phone. I remember you telling me why God did not answer the prayers of Adams and I getting pregnant again – because God did not want me to go it ALONE. You were the ONLY FRIEND that was in on our plans. You and uncle Leye were the only ones Adams felt he owed any explanations out of my friends till he passed. I remember the days, months, and now years after. Don’t think I do not know why you call me on his Anniversaries and birthdays and you just chat away! I know – just to make sure I am good! Yes! I always knew, just never said anything about it to you, but always told mummy! Hmmmm!!! Betty, what will I have done without your love? God bless you.

Our friendship is so interesting – so many unsaid words, so many days go by and we don’t see, yet, we understand each other like no other.

You are that one person in my life who no one else can be, and the friend that knows me like no one else does. You are the one that brings me back when I go on dreamlands 🙂 The only one that can make me dress up to a party, the only one that was able to take me out of my “browns, greys, black and whites!” 🙂 🙂

Your honesty is out of this world. Could be annoying sometimes, but I still appreciate it. Even AbbaModupe knows that “if mama needs to hear the truth without it being sugar-coated, she will call Aunty Betty!” That, I can’t put a price tag on.

Thank you for not just being there for me whenever I need you, but always.

For still remaining my friend not only when I am likeable, but also when I am irritable 🙂

For always reminding me of how much I am loved by God, and how much He ALWAYS come through for me when least expected, THANK YOU BETTY!

For always being my frontline cheerleader, no streak of envy or competition, always proud of my accomplishments and ready to urge me to do better, THANK YOU BETTY!

For being the BEST DECISION I made for my Sunshine – an adorable, prayerful and ever protective Godmother and confidante to him, THANK YOU “Aunty Betty.” – No regrets!

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Thank you for being the SISTER GOD ALLOWED ME TO CHOOSE, for motivating, encouraging, scolding, cheering, crying with me and saying something that will make us both laugh while crying and resume crying again, cheering me, bailing me out and everything you have been. For allowing me to share your family with no envy of my closeness to your biological sister because you know it won’t affect anything, for being a real daughter to my mum, THANK YOU BETTY.

I love a lot of things about you as much as I detest your mouth at times 🙂 I love your warmth, your innocence, and that smile that lights the world. I just love YOU!

May your destiny take you to every single place that is perfect for you that you have always dreamt of. May you live long to enjoy the fruits of your labor. May your life be continually full of colours, and all shades of joy and happiness. May you be protected from any harm that comes your way. May your spirits be continuously high and awakened in His presence. May God continue to bless, protect and take care of you and yours. May you continue to be an improved version of Betty of today. Amen.

I hope your day is glorious!

See you in a few hours to celebrate! Oh! Sorry, I forgot you are not 50 yet! Hahahaa!

With lots of love and tons of beary hugs I say HAPPY BIRTHDAY Eli!

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About VTI©

Valentina is a self motivated mother who has always committed herself to the service of humanity. In her quest to help in this wise, she has tales of personal experiences. Her challenges and successes which are always ongoing, and she'll be sharing with you without reserve. - Olusegun Idowu


  1. Happy buffday abetti betti, the older you guys are the prettier you are, meaning aging gracefully

  2. This is so cool. For you to describe someone as these, she must be so special. I don’t think anyone gets in to your good book that easily.
    Thank you so much Betty for being you. I say amen to all the prayers and add that God takes you beyond your imagination.
    Thank you for being part of the family. A worthy godmother you are, your G-son is blessed, you are blessed, your household is blessed. HAPPY BIRTHDAY and MANY HAPPY RETURNS.

    • I do not even know what to say Sis Mosun! You are right though……

      Life has taught me NOT to take people on face value anymore 🙂
      She is truly a GEM, though I can’t stand her mouth when she has to tell me as it is sometimes, but I am thankful I have some people who are not in my life for the benefits but because they TRULY care for, and love me and mine.

      I am BLESSED. Love you plenty big sis.

      A resounding Amen to your prayers.

  3. Betty I join my Sisi to wish you a happy birthday. Love you and God bless..

  4. Tears just kept flowing as I read this. We may not have physically met. But I’ve heard so much about you.
    Thank you Betty for being you. May God continue to bless you as you continue to stretch your hands to bless others.

    As you celebrate another year, May the glory of God continue to be with you, protect you and guide you as you walk this new year journey. May HE continue to bless your family and protect them all.

    Happy Birthday Betty. Igba odun, odun kan in Jesus name.

  5. Though I do not know you but, your description is interesting. I celebrate you too Betty. Happy Birthday. Age with grace.

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