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Just Can’t Help It!

Just can’t help it! Yeah, I love me!!! I really do, and I am sure that is no news to those that do REALLY know me! As a matter of fact, you do not need to really know me to know I do love me!

That being stated, I really could care less if anyone else does! Sound of arrogance? Not really! It is more of self-confidence and knowing my worth. Those that don’t like me are probably struggling with liking themselves! With that knowledge, I do not expect them to know how to love another.

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What prompted this article? Let us say I am in a phase in my life where I am “spring-cleaning!” Spring cleaning in Fall? Absolutely! One can decide to celebrate Christmas in September or anytime of the Year as it pleases one 🙂

Spring cleaning does come with a lot of reflections and decision-making. You have to reflect on what is in, what needs to stay and why, what needs to be thrown away, and what can be given to another. I love Spring cleaning myself, and yes, I do it all the time. However, this is a different kind of Spring cleaning which is by the way!

Speaking with a friend of almost twenty years, he said while going through my pictures on WhatsApp Status, he did not realize when he blurted out: “Chai! This my friend loves herself so much oo!” 🙂 I laughed and agreed with him. I also asked him a thought-provoking question. “If I do not love myself, how can I love another and WHY should I expect another to love me?” My son feels the same way especially when he has to be my photographer. He sometimes shakes his head and smiles while I strike my poses. Sometimes he will tell me: “mama, over sure dey worry you!” 🙂

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Yeah! Now that it has been affirmed that I do REALLY love myself and that I really do NOT care if you love me, let us move on! I must also add that I have been fortunate to have NEVER had to seek out love. I say I have more than enough GENUINE love flowing in my life for me to even miss anything! Trust me, I also recognize those I term as convenient lovers – you know those that love you when it is beneficial? I might pretend not to know, but I do! 🙂 If for any reason I show you love, and expect it back, please do NOT get it twisted – it is not a NEED, but a WANT. If you do not give it back, taking a nice walk is not a problem with me! I will say: See ya! Cash ya lerra in Jenifa’s voice!

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Loving myself is easy. I do accept my imperfections and strive to be a better person every blessed second. I do not subject myself to destructive criticisms from others, but do always welcome constructive criticisms done with love.

This takes me to a conversation with my late dad some years back. He made a statement on how two men I idolize – Archbishop Felix Alaba Job and my maternal uncle, Daddy Tunji Phillips, had and still have great influence in my life. He said with a chuckle (I miss my dad! May God continue to rest his interesting soul. Amen); “If she says this roof will come down, it only takes those two to call her name and she will calm down!” Hmmmm! So true! I agreed with dad, and explained WHY to him and his friend. THESE TWO MEN ALWAYS LISTEN TO ME BEFORE CORRECTING ME! THEY REALIZE I HAVE A VOICE AND SHOULD BE HEARD! THEY KNOW I AM HARMLESS, AND SOMETIMES JUST WANT TO VENT AND BE LISTENED TO! So, for those wondering why they both have so much influence over me, and why I will drop whatever to attend to them, you just discovered SOME of the MANY reasons. 🙂 They are my idols, they are my daddies, and yes, I am VERY LOYAL to them and damn all consequences! – Just saying!

If you are struggling with loving yourself, please contact me. However, the first step is acceptance of you and who God has created you to be. Acceptance of the fact that people will not always accept and love you, which is very okay. Again, they probably don’t love themselves anyway, so how can they love another?

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Self-love is knowing who I am. It is accepting who I am with all of my imperfections, flaws and what not. It is being kind to myself, being confident, and supportive of myself. Self-love takes courage and strength from above. To the best of my knowledge, I have ALWAYS loved myself, and for this, I am thankful to God 🙂 I know my worth.

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I am work in progress. The ONLY person I compare myself to is who I was a minute ago! The ONLY person I compete with, is ME! I do not think I am better than anyone, and at the same time I do not seek approval from anyone!

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Yes! I love Valentina so much! VTI is bae 🙂

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About VTI©

Valentina is a self motivated mother who has always committed herself to the service of humanity. In her quest to help in this wise, she has tales of personal experiences. Her challenges and successes which are always ongoing, and she'll be sharing with you without reserve. - Olusegun Idowu

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